Recent events has helped me to shape my thinking a bit! I find that in life, many times things boils down to Response and Motive! (and i realised Motive and Response has the same initials of Melancholic Reflections! :P)
What this means is that every action is a Response and behind every Response there is a Motive to it. Many a times we try our best to do good for both, but most of the times we fail in at least one.
Sometimes, we may have a good motive but our response might not be appropriate. For example, hitting a child, may seem like a bad response, but the motive behind hitting the child can be justified. The parent wants to teach and prevent the child from straying from the good path, that in itself has a good motive, but is it the right response?
Yet sometimes good responses could have a wrong motive. For example, doing your homework earlier than required. Well, the motive could be to do your best for God, however, it could be because you want to feel superior to your peers. Is doing homework early so you brag about it a good motivation?
Once again, even in the grey spots there are confusing occurrence. What if you try to love someone you hate? Is that a good response? Some say yes because it is a good effort! Some say no, because you will not be yourself. Is the motive good? Well, one part of you shouts,’ just ignore him!’ Another part of you says,’But God told me to love my enemies!’ So what will be the motivation for loving him? Because God told me to do so.
When you try your best to complete a project in church. It seems like a good Response, but what is your Motive in doing it? Is it to gain recognition? Is it out of responsibility? Is it because the mentor you respect asked you to do it? Or is it because you love God and trust that God will shape you with it? To help you grow more spiritually mature?
Response by itself is very pure, very simple. But once you add Motive in, the whole equation complicates, and the simple becomes messy and confusing. Too bad we live in a complicated world with people pursuing things that won’t satisfy them. Too bad Motive behind an action is so important.
Well, think about it, every sin is the result of the devil tempting us and our flesh succumbing. For example, lying, this is such a vague term, very few could explain lying in words. So how did this sin even come about?
Let us imagine this scene. You as a child, very pure, no idea what is right or wrong. You are being fed by your mother. Being full, you push the bowl away. The bowl hits the ground and porridge spills all over the ground. Enraged, your mother scolds you. Even though you do not understand the language, you know that your mother is angry and you know that you did something wrong. Fast forward to the age of 3. You begin to learn and understand the language. You can speak and your parents understand you. Then one day, you accidentally knock into a vase. The vase shatters. You start to freak out. You remember when something spoils because of you, you will get scolded. This is when the devil steps in, ‘Hey, you know the language, your parents understand you now! Do you really need to say that you broke the vase? You can say that the dog did it, they will believe you! And most importantly, you will not get scolded! Isn’t that nice?’ You afraid of the punishment you say the lie.
Ironic isn’t it? That not wanting punishment is the Motive for the Response(Lying). If the lie was revealed, you will get punished even more! Not only is it ironic, it is sad. I don’t think ‘Not wanting punishment’ as Motive is bad, yet the Response itself is bad.
I am not here to judge anything. I do not have the ability to judge(oh and i am 16+! I can’t judge someone who is older than me!). I am in no place to judge because i don’t know everything.
I can imagine, when Judgement day comes, i believe God will judge all my sins, lying, lusting, harsh words, jealousy, coveting etc etc. He will give me the punishment that i deserve, Death. But God himself will step down from the throne become a human and die for me. And all my sins will be justified.
God, i am simply human. You know everything. Allow my Responses be good. Allow my Motives be right! God, help me to continue to be sanctified! Help me through!
Thank You God!
Haha, i sometimes feel i am overanalysing stuff, but well, hope it has blessed you! 🙂