A friend of mine had a blog post that went viral. My first reaction is not to read the post or feel happy for her. My first reaction was, “poor thing…”
Please do not get me wrong alright, i am very proud to say that i know this girl! However, you have to realise something, her blog was not meant to be an viral blog or a blog that post articles, her blog was for herself to reflect and track her walk with the Lord(Just like how mine is).
Anyone who has blogged for a while would know this, you are stuck in this weird paradoxical feeling of wanting people to read your blog and not wanting anyone to read your blog. Or you simply want other people(not your friends) to read. Posts to someone is a very personal thing to someone(unless of course it is your job to write blog posts). Someone reading my blog is like you looking into my brain and my soul. It feels really naked when someone reads my posts(But, i am alright with it! 🙂 please continue to read!). Just imagine what she would be feeling with SOOOO many people reading her blog?
No idea, she might be feeling the direct opposite to what i think. I simply think that it is really scary to have my friends that only knows me as an idiot reading my melancholic thoughts. I tend to over think A LOT. Sometimes, i simply become an idiot so as to not appear as unfriendly. Oh no, i sound like a certain Mel Sang now! -sigh- So ya guys, please do not find me weird after seeing my thought life ah! HAHA!
Being Melancholic is something that i view as both as a curse and a blessing. It is tiring to always overthink. It gets so bad that the only way to counter overthinking about something is to overthink about how to stop myself from overthinking or like to think of an argument to stop myself from thinking. It is very paradoxical. However, it is very rewarding in the way that i interact with people, mentor people and for my own depth and walk.
I would never want this blog to be viral, but if God wants to use it, so be it. Haha, i would then create another blog to post personal stuff! 😛 School is starting like tmr. -sigh- oh well, round 2!~