=324= Reflections: 2015

How was the past year?

One word.

Tiring.

I never thought juggling between school and ministry could be so tiring. For the previous two years, the workload in school wasn’t that bad. Even though I had panic attacks and all, it all did not seem that big after I thought about it. This year, the time to do anything was so little that it just drained me. I now have so little time to prepare cell kit, do homework and revise, prepare for worship sets, I just don’t have that big a capacity to do it all. I have been sleeping later recently, my mind just becomes restless and I will surf the net until I am tired… 😦

I am really disappointed with my performance as a CL the past year. I just burned out halfway. I am really sorry for the kids I neglected. I am sorry.

For CAMY, I really enjoyed serving and worshiping God in the past year. However, whenever things pile up, I just get so off form… 😦

I don’t really like how I have become in the past year. I guess mainly because of the conflicts and events that happened, I became someone rather toned down and awkward. I no longer know how to make people laugh. It may sound rather minor, but it is not. Like come on, I want to have a good sense of humour. I want to have good people skills. However, I must refrain first, at least for the next half a year. Really need to beat the crap out of my flesh! Lord, help me again. 

Oh well, I think it may be good for me to take a break.

However, this year isn’t all THAT bad luhh. It was the year that I discovered many things about myself.

For one, I picked up many new skills in the past year. Photography, Guitar and “sound checking”(like really basic stuff only). The learning curve is extremely steep. However, I am enjoying it!

I did bring one of my boys back and I am grateful.

I asked for friends and I did get them! Though next year, one of them is gonna serve in a different ministry as I am! I need more friends! 😩

I need brothers that I can share my life with. A group of friends that I can pour my life out to and be vulnerable with them! I kinda wanna hang out with people my age or older! Pretty strange that I am the oldest among the CLs in my LC. Oh well, we will see I Guess!

I just got asked to teach drums in My Drum School! I am actually really interested, but I dunno… I don’t really have time… -sigh- Lord, please give me wisdom to choose and decide!

Something I really want to tell my kids is that they are really Young! They should try to discover and learn as much as they can! To find a passion. I should too! I should continue to find more things to learn. After all a guy that just stays there and do nothing is boring.

Oh well, let’s work hard for the next year and see how! 🙂 excited!

Though I don’t really want school to start… Like noo…. I need more sleep!

Ok! Enough Then!

Let’s move on!

-Kelvin-

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