=328=Words of Joy: On The Street

On The Street

Whatever I wanted to say about this was already said in the previous post, this is just the link to my photos(Hope that the embedding works!)! Hope you like it! 😀

Oh, just click on the photo! It will redirect you to my Flickr account! DO give me more views! HAHA!

-Kelvin-

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=327= Reflections: Spoke

Today, I went around Clark Quay to take photos again! Except, this time, I went with manual focus and I set my focal length to be 50mm!

It was quite difficult. I realised how much I relied on auto focus! I just cannot get used to focusing by distance and turning the ring instead of half pressing the shutter button. I had to estimate the distance between me and my subject and prefocus if I want to get in and out quickly. Still cannot get used to it. I missed the focus on several shots and sometimes missed shots because my instinct told me to half press the button instead of turning the ring.

However, it was quite exciting! 😀 some people did not notice me, hence, giving me time to focus in and really try to get that “bokeh”!

Some noticed me, but because I was too slow on the focus, missed the focus.

Some noticed me, but thought that I was shooting something else, hence, allowed me to shoot them candidly! 🙂

So what exactly am I doing?

I am trying to shoot candid shots on the streets. To capture beautiful moments that touches people’s hearts. I think there is worth doing this. I want to capture reactions and expressions in people’s lives. So yeah! Gotta love street photography and how exciting it is!

I actually experienced the first person that asked me to delete a photo! I was testing my skill of prefocusing. So I was outside of Starbucks and I pointed my camera at a couple, the couple noticed me and asked me to delete it! Oh well, they weren’t in focus anyway!

So yeah! Take photos of people you don’t know candidly. If they notice you, look at them, smile and nod your head! If they are offended and want their photo deleted, just delete it and say sorry! There is no point in trying to do something like this and get someone angry!

I am glad to be living in the digital age where things like Autofocus, Liveview, LCD Screen and Electronic View Finder exists! Just makes everything a lot easier! I heard, back in the film days, you cannot tell if a shot is good or not rift after shooting it. You need to wait for the whole roll of film to finish, develop it then you can see the results. Hence, I heard that people try to aim for 1 winner in a roll of film. Which is still pretty wasteful and expensive. Thank God for SD cards, I shot like 1k plus photos already and I still have space in my SD card! Try doing that with film and you will burn a HUGE hole in your pocket!

A good camera should have enough automation, so that it is easier to use and not confusing, and it should have enough control over the photo, so that, it is actually you using your mind to frame and compose the shot and not the camera. I saw a video of the NEX-7, my camera’s predecessor, and I found the design to be a bit confusing! I think they nailed the design for the A6000! Not the best, but it is very easy to get used to! Like it doesn’t have two dials, but it is easy enough to change such stuff! The quick set menu is good and useful! I am still loving my camera so far! 🙂 It is just so great that it is so small that I can just bring along with me everywhere I go in any bag and still have a good grip that I can shoot one handed! It is absolutely amazing!

I degressed so much from the title of the post! HAHA!

The title being what was saying how God spoke to me in J333 today. I stepped in and sat down during J333 and I heard the full time staff praying. I heard a voice, a voice so rich in the spirit that you can hear it. I am not kidding. When I heard I immediately turned to see who was it! It was the Pastor that spoke in R-AGE during GINK! Pastor Randy if I am not wrong. I was prompted to go ask him for prayer. That was just strange! Haha! We don’t know each other and I just ask for prayer? Wow!

I did anyway, he prayed a general prayer over me and I went back! Quite a funny occurrence.

When I was worshiping, I was just in awe of how we worshipped as a congregation! I heard the congregation sang and that just touched my heart.

“I will lead you there” God spoke to me.

I was just shocked by this word. I have thought about it and was quite interested, but I never thought that God would actually affirm me like that. It is gonna be scary and amazing! I am sure of it! 🙂

“I will lead you there”

I don’t believe you God, show me! 🙂

Then, I went up to pray over my family. Kennaf came up to me and prayed. He left me with this word, “I see a farmer plowing. This is what it means, continue to plow and it will bear fruit.”

This is an encouragement not just for my family but for myself.

Then, tonight, I did something that was quite unlike me. I went up to the adult drummer and gave him suggestions.

I actually wanted to do that for a long time already. Not the act of giving suggestions to adults, but helping drummers in general. Like if it was a youth, I would have gave him suggestions after rehearsal immediately. However, with adults, I am a little bit more worried. This is because, it just seemed a bit strange that I as a younger man would go up to someone older to help him. I struggled with this for such a long time. However, tonight was different. Like I was still scared, but I wasn’t worried about what others would think at all. So I stepped out and did it! Simple faith!

I did that and two things he said stuck with me. One was if I wanted to serve for J333, not in a taunting way, but yeah, they lack drummers. Well, I wouldn’t mind I guess, but I am really busy. This led him to say the second thing which just annoyed me. He said that youths very free one! -.- I told him no and he still said, “really really” come on! Trust me! I AM NOT FREE! Sure working life may be hard and busy, but that doesn’t mean that my life is free! Just see my everyday life and see how busy I am! Ok now Kelvin, stop ranting.

But yeah, just this two. He was actually very nice, so sorry for portraying him to be annoying. He was willing to listen to my suggestions when I suggested. That in itself is more than enough! He did say that the electronic drums are different, like they won’t trigger. Yup! I understand! There is a gate! But they still work in the same concept! It shouldn’t be that it affects THAT much. It is amazing drums too. So much better than the kit we played in Furama! So yeah! Work hard and play for God man! 🙂

Oh well, things are looking up! 🙂

-Kelvin-

=326= Words of Melancholy: Rough Day

It had just been the roughest day ever. However, I still cannot say that it was a bad day.

Today, we came to the briefing for stop motion. Which was cool. However, I realised that I needed to finish one of my assignments today. In which I haven’t even started… 😦 Hence, I tried to do it, but the Internet in school was just WAY too slow.

Then, after scouting for a room with my group, we went back and Mr Viktor announced the results for ATE. I got 55 out of 100. My heart just sank. I mean, I knew that I won’t do VERY well, but I thought I would at least get 60-70 plus. My mood became really depressed. I felt like crying, but I restrained. I really worked very hard for ATE. I did up a formula list, I did the paper. I memorised stuff. I did my very best already. Are you telling me that my best isn’t good enough? 

Even so, I still went on with the assignment and managed to do a great deal of it.

I decided to go church early to be alone for a while and just somehow or another feel better. On the way to the shell kiosk bus stop, I passed by the pull up bar. I decided to vent my frustrations by doing pull ups, but how pathetic, I can’t even do one real one. I need help from my legs. I guess I am just really envious of someone. This is bad, I should stop my evil coveting. Helped a bit I guess! Making my arms and chest feel a little weight does help.

Then at the bus stop, bumped into Jie Jun. Complained to her about how depressed I was. Felt better saying it out loud. Was nice to have her there to cheer me up a bit! 🙂 I guess I am really a Sanguine. I feed off people’s responses to me. Like after the first Emerge service, I wasn’t drained at all! In fact, I was energised. I believe that because they were young, they are not at the cool cool stage and would still respond to me! One of the most tiring things to do in a group, is trying your best to hype up your group but they don’t respond. That tires me WAY more than having me be an insane Jim Carrey person. At least, I have a connection and I am not the only one giving.

Got to the bus stop, went to NTUC and bought a pack of spicy tapioca snack. Was so good! 🙂

Did my work until I lost track of time. I did work until dinner, I normally would leave like 1 hour free to practice a bit.

Had dinner, was nice! 

Worship rehearsal was difficult. Having not used metronome for so long, I just kept going off time. 😦 Then, I missed the 3/4 bar in “Whom Shall I Fear” in my preparation. Leb was really disappointed. 😦 The last time I played this song was at Hometeam NS and that set was horrible too. My brain just went along with it even after some strange pauses, I thought, it was just me not playing in time. Just so bad.

Sounded rough enough? I still cannot say that it was a bad day. The reason being that I met God today. Of course not physically, but I could really sense His presence tonight and it broke me. First time being ministered by the song I am playing while I am playing it to the point when I broke down. I played and all the emotions came.

Forever he is glorified

Forever he is lifted high

Forever he is risen

He is alive, He is alive!

The spoken word portion really stirred me up. And I was tearing up while playing, during rehearsal. I can’t believe that.

Then, after rehearsal, I asked Leb to help me point out the 3/4 bar again. Then, Brian told me to play for God. This word; telling me to play for God and not man or myself have been repeating recently. However, I guess it just didn’t go in until tonight. Brian shared and it hit me right in the heart. I was about to cry already but I left before I did. I cried while walking down the stairs. Complained once again about how my best isn’t enough.

Funny thing is that, I know that it isn’t. My best can never reach God’s standard of perfection. I learned that. I even taught that. How could I have forgotten about it? My best isn’t good enough, that is why like Brian said, “HAVE FAITH”. Have faith in a God that loved me so much that he gave his one and only Son for me. That he would die for me. Let him take control. Let him guide your life. Not my best, but let him show you his best. His best of dying for me.

A reassuring sentence from Brian telling me that I can do it was really nice. I really needed the encouragement.

I then went back home and had a nice chat with Shena about Photography! 🙂 Really needed my mind to be on something else and not be so freaking melancholic.

You know what? You know what started this season of ungratefulness and coveting? From my application of my scholarship and overseas trips. Sure. I do not have a CCA and that makes me under qualified for MANY things in school. You know what, so be it. Even if my best work, my best lesson, my best set is overlooked by the world, so be it. I need to stop being jealous over people with good grades, good group of friends, good CCA record, good fitness. Stop. Just stop. I made a decision as a man to honour my God, to serve him with whatever capacity I have, I live with it. No not just live with it, I live with it gratefully. Sure, I gave up a lot. However, I cannot say that I lost much. I gave it up for God, for my family, for my kids, for my ministry. For what I deem more important. For that I give thanks. That when others pursue things that wouldn’t last, I pursued something that will last. For eternity and beyond.

So when you catch me being ungrateful, rebuke me. Remind me of the things I have.

God, please start a new chapter of my life with you in control!

Good results, bad results, whatever, bring it on. Whom shall I fear if God is with me?

-Kelvin-

=325= Reflections: Japalang Thoughts

I think writing cards is a really nice thing! To be able to share your life and thank the person with the words you picked! I really do love really it! However, card writing just takes WAY too long for me!

It takes me forever to write a card, I need to think of the past year and think of what happened. Think of what to thank him/her for. Think of what to say. Think of what to share. The whole process just takes too long! On the night before New Year Eve, I sat myself down to type down what I want to say to my mentors. I type and I took close to 2 hours and I still cannot finish… 😩

Then when I say myself down to write the card, the average time taken for me to write one was 15 minutes for one person. Just -sigh-

It is very tough for me to find the time to sit down and do that now that I have so much school work.

Though, it was nice! 🙂 I actually had an idea of a gift, but didn’t have the time to execute it!

Met up with Javier and Zephen today! Was nice! We shared about the expectations of ourselves as leaders and what we would like to achieve in cell this year.

Mine was simple.

Expectation of myself was to be a good example to my boys and to care for them during the week.

What I would like to achieve, to have a cell that is bonded, that will support each other as brothers. This has been my goal for cell ever since I shared cell with Kiat. In Kiat’s words, “There are other outlets to spiritual feeding; service, ministry etc. So I would concentrate on giving them a place where they can support each other and be brothers.” I just think that everyone needs a place where they can find rest and enjoy.

Our cell’s tentative name is “J-Walkers”  for Walking with Jesus! 😂

Serving today and having that extra two hours let me roam around and see my boys in action. I saw Jerome having regionals and having fun. Though I didn’t see Royce lead, but it was good to see my boys in cell! 😀 Really pray that they will be fine! Protect them Lord. 

Was so happy over something today! 😀

Once again, I found that the weakest part of my spiritual walk is evangelism. I am just so bad at it! 😦 So to counter that, I signed up for the Befrienders ministry! HAHA! Well, I see a point in it and that is something that I want to challenge myself to do. So hopefully, that works out!

On Wed, JiaXing asked me if I wanted to teach in MDS for the bouna branch. Well, to be honest, I am really interested! Like I really like teaching drums! So I thought about it and I am giving it a try! Maybe just Sat morning! Hopefully, I will have the time to do it!

During the two hours of free time that I had, I decided to use a 16 inch crash for worship! It was nice! Like I was able to keep time with it like a ride and use it to do swells and fill up the frequencies and dynamics! Was great! Should have done that long ago!

Recently, I was giving moving up to YA more thought and I am becoming more and more interested with moving up next year! Not anything luhh, but I just think that I am not cut out to be a RL. Having more time to do stuff that I want to might be nice too! The friends there are definitely a great plus! Now is now lah! But if God calls at the end of the year, can’t run one! Haha! So we will see how! Even if I am moving up next year doesn’t mean I can slack off in ministry next year! Make this year the last and leave youth with no regrets! 🙂

I really want to backpack somewhere! Planning to do it sometime after I graduate! Don’t have an exact plan or place I wanna go yet! But I would like to stay somewhere where I can get to know the locals well! So yeah! Hopefully I can! 😀

My resolutions for 2016 is:
1. To get silver for NAPFA Test(Oh God, help…)
2. To have a great year in ministry next year!
3. To overcome lust!
4. To take more and better photos!
5. To play the guitar better and 
6. To write more songs
7. To learn how to sing properly! HAHA!
8. To learn how to be a better technical person! Thank you internship! 
9. To have a blast in internship!
10. To buy a new lens
11. To buy Logic Pro
12. To be more vulnerable with more people
13. To forge friendships with my co-cell leaders
14. To meet up with Mad Jack with everyone
15. To meet up with JED! 2014

Can’t wait for the year 2016 to end alr! HAHAHAHA! But yeah! I pray that it wil be a good one! 🙂

Thank you God!

To the next!

-Kelvin-