There are times when I really do miss serving. I am a chronic workaholic that likes to be busy, but the funny thing is that God wanted me to rest this year. I was struggling with the fact that I needed rest.
I constantly want to move forward because I know that time and life is short and I want to make the best use of everything. I want to learn what I want, I want to do what I planned. I want to be creative in the ways I approach things. However, somewhere along my years in service, it seemed like I forgot how to seek God. It seemed like I forgot how to ask for his wisdom. Every step forward seems to be in the wrong direction from where I need to go.
Like a tourist trying to find his way back to the hotel, he asks his way around. The locals tells him that the only way is to walk one big round to the hotel. However, being lazy and tired, the tourist just wants to find a shortcut to cut through. However, the more he tried, the more time he is spending to return to his hotel.
This year, I felt that God had reset my life. I am relearning new joys in old spiritual disciplines. I am trying new things once again. Being disciplined to rest has given me joy again.
Looking back, I am still amazed at how God has used my life. I still remember that socially awkward kid from NA. He changed my whole life around. I am now a man that has so much ability all because of Him.
I give thanks for how God has given me human support through the years. I remember that time when I just lost three of my closest friends. It was extremely lonely. I had no idea how to make a new friend. I still remember saying that I don’t want to be hurt again. I really don’t. Being really sour about losing them, I asked God to give me friends and pillars. Fast forward to this year, I have in fact gained many new friends and support that I never thought would have happened.
Life has changed significantly. New passions found. I have gained more experience in handling all these messy stuff. I am extremely grateful. Thank You God for blessing me!
May my walk be guided by you. May I not deviate from your word. May my future be defined and unfolded by you.